Tuesday, July 17, 2012

And the Roller Coaster Begins! Hold on for Your Life!

The last 24 hours have been a bit crazy for me! Yesterday, my agency rep emailed me asking if I was truly interested in a sibling set. "YES! Definitely YES!" I wrote back! Hours later I got an email about a boy/girl sibling set, approximately 2 and 4 years old. They have not been at the orphanage long enough to be matched with a family, but I am at the top of the waiting list, and if and when they are referred, they will be referred to me. It was hell trying to go to sleep last night! After a couple hours of back and forth emails on cost and how things would work--I was doing all this by iPhone while watching Glee with my best friend and her kids--I went home and laid in bed, absolutely wired and a bit overwhelmed. I wondered if I could possibly go from 0 kids to 2 all at once as a single parent.

After finally sleeping about four hours, I woke up wide awake and checked my email, eager to get more information. Nothing. So then I decided to go walk away my nervous energy on a local free track. As I was walking, I received an email from the agency of three pictures. They took a full five minutes to download, and all I could think was that I was possibly about to see pictures of my future kids--family for the rest of my life. How strange is that?! When the pictures finally opened, there they were!!!! A little girl with furrowed eyebrows and a fly on her face eating rice...a tiny baby boy slung over a man's shoulder!!! And then a third little girl, chubby as can be...whaaaaaaat?! A third little girl?

There was no accompanying message, so I called and emailed my agency. An hour later, after I had emailed the picture to family and a close friend, the agency emailed me back--"No, no, so sorry! Those are other people's kids! You were accidentally included on the email for some reason." Again, whaaaaaat?!!!! "The kids I was telling you about just arrived at the orphanage this morning. We still have to blood test them for diseases before we can make a referral. It will be a few weeks."

Sigh. That was the end of the roller coaster. What an emotional high, followed by a slow, but not too upsetting, dip. I have no more information now. I hope to have more information within the next few weeks and maybe even a referral, but adoption seems to move as slow as molasses, so I will be keeping busy and trying to keep my mind from obsessing about a possible 2 and 4 year old in an orphanage somewhere in Kinshasa, DRC. Life sure is a wild ride... Pray for my sanity! Thanks for your support.


  1. Anna, hang in there! Everyone I know that has adopted has issues with things like this and in the end.....it all works out. I know it is such a roller coaster, but when you finally get a child or children they and you, will have such support and love that you will be totally fine.

  2. Welcome to the ride, Anna. It'll be the longest, but most worthwhile roller coaster of your life. I, too, had a 'psych' referral about 4 months before I got my actual referral. That beautiful baby girl turned out to be a scam -- some orphanage director was trying different agencies to see how much would be paid to adopt this gorgeous little girl. I was devastated -- for nearly 2 days I thought that little one was my girl.
    But it does sound like your agency is working to find you a referral, and God knows there are so many children in orphanages who need families!
    Today I had an annual physical and I was telling my doctor that I've been really emotional lately. She said, that makes sense, it's like your going through a pregnancy and are about to give birth (I travel in August). That made me feel a little less insane (only a little).
    So, Anna, hang in there. Do whatever you do to keep your body and mind busy. Channel your energy into positive things. If it helps, go to Goodwill (or somewhere you won't spend too much money) and shop for little kid clothes that you could possibly use. If they don't work for your eventual children, you can donate them back or give them away! I did A LOT of that in the months I was waiting for a referral.
    Use this time to conduct prepare yourself mentally for all that's to come, and read, read, read. One book that I love is "Parenting Your Internationally Adopted Child". I loved it because it helped me feel prepared for potential issues with some advice for dealing with them.
    The most important thing is to know that you are not alone. All the families on the FB group (and yahoo groups) have done this themselves (or, are doing this) and sympathize with your every emotion (and I know there are many).
    My thoughts are with you as you wait.

  3. What an exciting journey! Only God knows where you will be in a few short months. May He bless you with patience and peace.

  4. How exciting! I am awaiting a phone call like this too!